Season’s Greetings and Random Notes…

It is quite a thing for me to find myself with a few moments to myself and thus, I offer my free time to you, the readers who happen upon this place to provide you with some greetings of the holiday season and a few random notes.

If you are like me and are all sorts of Grinchy this time of year, I say, hang in there, it is almost over.  If you are the festive holiday type, I truly do offer the wellest of wishes to you and hope that Santa brought you something good.

Mrs. JFB and I had a very subdued, very lounge-like Christmas that involved very little movement off the couch and lots of TV.  I did go out for a nice long walk but that was about as much exercise as I could conjure up.

So, I did get an interesting e-mail in my inbox.  It was from a lady who said, “I’m working on a free mental health project focused on educating people about various everyday topics, and I’d like to link to your site;…”

She specifically mentioned the Links tab that I have and don’t do a good job of keeping up to date.  She then went on to say, “…none of the content on your site will be copied or spoken of in a negative tone.”

I did a little research on the name associated with the e-mail she sent, and it does seem she is a legitimate freelance writer.  I did give my consent but also asked in response if I had a mental health issue she was addressing.  I asked half joking, but never saw a response.

The funny thing is, since I’ve been blogging, both on this blog and former vanilla blogs, I have gotten numerous requests to use photos or quote things I’ve written.  I think it is great that people ask since I happen to know several professional photographers who constantly find their work stolen.

Anyway, I’ll be checking back to see in what way someone could find my particular jumble of links (mostly to Tumblrs) to be associated with some sort of mental health issue.  I’m not saying I don’t probably have some sort of mental health issue, mind you, so maybe this will be informative.

And maybe I should go click through the links and remove old broken ones.

Speaking of Tumblr.  I need to cut back.  I mean, really, I find it so easy to be checking my phone and just click on that app and find myself wasting five minutes here or there.  The problem is, when I see an interesting photo, I want to chase the link back to the original Tumblr and see what other interesting things they have.  This is going to sound weird, but I have found myself looking at foreign Tumblrs, including places like India and Pakistan.

Now there is no question that, as a white guy, I have a solid interest in ethnic people.  That is to say, darker skin tones, especially given that San Antonio is made up of so many Latina’s.  But looking at women from India, Pakistan, Turkey, Malaysia and so many middle eastern and southeast Asian places, I’ve found their amateur porn and pictures to be so much different, yet so similar to what people here do.

One example is, cuckolds.  I know it is not anything new and it was not invented by Americans, but holy hell, who knew so many Paki men want to watch their wife being fucked by another man? And of course, gay men.  I had no idea that in lands where being gay is a considerably dangerous thing, that so many men are blowing each other, and making videos of the act.

I have been attracted to women of the Indian and Pakistani areas for a while.  And women who cover themselves?  It is true that there is something so seductive about seeing a woman in a hijab who strips.  It is a lot more interesting that watching a woman at the beach in a bikini show her boobs.  In this case, it is a deliberate seductive act of displaying the forbidden.  Or maybe I’m just a damn pervert.

There is a downside of looking at some foreign stuff.  I have seen quite a few videos where I feel like either, the intent was to come across as abusive, or, it really was abusive.  An example being a man having sex with a woman who, when her face is shown seems to not be enjoying life.  Maybe I’m reading into it.  Maybe she is not enjoying the fact that he is fucking her while he takes video of the act.  But in some cases, it just seems like a bad situation.

I have to admit, I’m somewhat sensitive to that sort of thing.  My main reason for disliking commercial porn is the looks of anger on the guy’s faces as they seem to hate-fuck these actresses.  I get it, they are playing to an audience of angry young (or old) men who hate the fact that they can’t get any pussy for themselves.  But I’ve always asked, who could be so mad at having sex?  You are having sex, why are you so angry about it?

On the brighter side, I like seeing all shapes and sizes and bodies that will never make it to the airbrushed pages of Maxim or Playboy.  I just prefer people who have flaws and an extra few pounds.  I like seeing women who do not have the perfect complexion or men who don’t have 8 inches of cock.  If I’m being honest, I prefer men with five inches.  Bigger or smaller is fine, too.  But just saying.

I can only assume that the Tumblr game will come to an end before too long and I’ll have to find the next place to look at the pictures people post of themselves.

To all the people I regularly correspond with via e-mail, I hope my slacking over the holidays has not been too obvious.  I always enjoy the e-mails I get and I really do try to e-mail back as soon as I can.

In case I don’t post again before the 1st day of 2018, I’d like to leave by saying, good fucking riddance to 2017.  Hoping all of you have a wonderfully prosperous and sexually exciting new year.

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The Right Way To Do It… Or Not.

The whole concept of my wife having a regular friends with benefits arrangement with JD has just become so routine for us.  And yes, I know they are more than just friends.  For some guys, that would be a deal breaker.  For me, I prefer there to be some commitment there. 

This life is not for everyone.  If you are a guy who has these hotwife fantasies, you really have to be careful that you may get what you ask for and then not be able to handle it. 

We’ve been doing this in some form or fashion for years, and I assure you, there have been some glitches along the way.  But now, after over thirty years of marriage, we are in a good place for this particular part of our relationship. 

Nothing is perfect.  Don’t believe those unbelievable Facebook curated perfect marriages.  You know what I mean.  The pictures are tightly cropped to show great bodies, all smiles and happy couples.  Meanwhile, they are probably sick of each other and only staying together for the kids and the mortgage payment. 

I’m not trying to suggest my wife and I are in a perfect world either.  We aren’t.  But this particular part is pretty damn good. 

I only bring it up because I don’t want people who come across this or similar blogs to point to this as the perfect way forward.  If you read the advice of hotwife lifestyle experts, you’ll see that my wife and I broke all the rules. 

First and foremost, we have been with people we know or guys I’ve worked with.  Most experts will say that presents too much risk.  What if the relationship goes bad? Now what?  Or what if the wife falls in love? 

Another rule we broke is that my wife routinely meets with JD without me being present.  Many experts say that is playing with fire.  But keep in mind, we’ve been doing this for years.  I don’t have a jealous bone in my body, so if I can’t get home from work in time, why should I stop my wife and JD from having a good time?

In terms of openness and honesty, I am a complete scoundrel.  I have this blog, a Tumblr, I have a dozen email confidants with whom I share my thoughts and issues beyond what I write here or share with my wife. 

I went on a nationally presented podcast and confessed to having a completely secret life my wife knows nothing of.

I have confided in people who know my wife, which is frankly my biggest sin.  That is to say, my wife talks to these people and has no idea that that person knows details about our sex life.  Or have seen my dick.  Or have shown me their private parts. 

To many people who engage in sexually open arrangements with their spouse, I think they’d look at us as doing everything wrong.  I’m just trying to point out to those people who read this, you have to think long and hard before you take a stab at it.  And then, you have to do it in a way that works for your relationship.  There is no real right or wrong, only what works for you.

About Last Night…

I have a friend, Co-worker C, the gay colleague of mine, who will not drink alone.  I guess he figured out years ago that nothing good comes from a lone drinker, sipping beers and contemplating life. 

My wife and I did a shrimp boil for dinner. It was our first time trying the recipe and it was great, especially with the beers we drank along with the shrimp, sausage, potatoes and such. 

After dinner we retreated to the hot tub for an hour of more drinking and talk.  From there, we headed to the bedroom for some Friday night sex followed by showers and then made our way upstairs to watch TV before bed. 

Instead of our normal shows, there was a basketball game on and this is where things went awry.  I decided to watch the game and drink several more beers and she opted to make phone calls. 

My first bad act was that while she was on the phone with her sister, I proceeded to have a conversation with that same sister where I confessed that I wanted to go down on her. 

Yep.  While my wife was talking to her. 

The sister shut me down and told me to delete the conversation which I did.  I’ll apologize to her today. 

Next, I had a conversation with the daughter of the late Co-Worker Rick.  That was a legitimate conversation with no sexual overtones, but she is 23 and cute, so I’m sure if there had been an opening, I would have gone there.  Pure creeper. 

At some point my wife decided to go to bed.  I should have joined her but instead I had one more beer and when I saw a friend of my wife’s online, I started chatting with her.  She got flirty fast.  Who says women don’t initiate these conversations? 

She sent me her boobs and I sent her my dick.  Well, now I know.  She’d be down to fuck if the opportunity presented itself, but I doubt that will ever happen. 

I deleted that conversation and moved on.  Next a chatted with my wife’s other sister.  No sex there, but it was a nice friendly chat. 

Finally, I started a conversation with a friend from my vanilla life.  I regretted it immediately because I realized I had nothing to say to her that didn’t involve sexual questions.  So I moved on and went to bed. 

I would say that I certainly was not drunk in the sense of people getting liquored up and doing stupid things, but I was tipsy.  And I rarely have conversations like I did last night.  I need to tuck my phone away somewhere the next time I have a few beers. 

Does Penis Size Relate to Desire to be Cuckolded?

I recently had a conversation with a fellow blogger who shall remain anonymous unless he chooses to identify himself, wherein we were trading stories about having a shy bladder.  One of the crappiest things about being in the military or working for the government is the constant requirement to take a pee test.  This isn’t the sort of thing in the civilian sector where they hand you a cup and you retreat to a private restroom to fill it up. 

In the military, they have an actual observer who must visually observe the urine transfer from your wiener (or vagina) into the cup.  This is evidence people, and if you’ve been smoking dope or injecting yourself with heroin, they want the observer to be able to testify in a court that they can verify it was your pee that went in the cup.

Okay, so if you have to do this sort of thing several times a year, you’d think that you’d just get used to it and be able to whip it out, fill the cup and move along.  Not me.  I’m a man in my mid-fifties, and no matter how many times I have to perform this service for my country, my dick seems to not only put the clamp down on urine delivery, but worse, I shrivel up like a prune.

I’ve often imagined that if I was a well endowed guy, I’d gladly stroll into the collection point, penis hanging out for all to see, ready to take on any and all observers.  But alas, I am already starting from the “average” dick size and when I have to pee in front of a crowd or at a bar where they don’t have those dividers, or heaven forbid, the trough still found in some Texas places, my dick goes tiny.

The strange thing is, if you’ve read this blog, you know I have no issue at all with showing my dick to others.  But the reality is, when I do that, I am not shriveled up.  I don’t even have to be semi-erect or fully hard.  That weirdness isn’t present, even in front of more endowed guys.  I have no problem with being the guy with the smaller dick in front of other people.  Just don’t make me pee.

So it just so happens that this fellow blogger I was talking with is into the Hotwife/cuckold scene as I am.  While we had a good laugh agonizing over our less than huge dicks, it occurred to me that most of the men I’ve encountered who were into the cuckold fetish, one of the turn ons was the idea of, or more importantly, the visual of their wife taking a much more well endowed lover. 

There is an entire genre of the cuckold world focused on the Big Black Cock (BBC).  I frankly find it slightly racist, but that’s not the point.  The point is the first B in BBC.  Big, for Big Cock.  How many cuckolds want their wife to hook up with a guy who happens to be hung like a third grader? 

If you read any Hotwife or cuckold sort of erotica, the male writer almost always makes reference to the larger size of the other male or even goes into great detail about how the “bull” (a term I hate) stretched his wife’s pussy or how she was in such pain from it all.  Some dipshits write about how he was so large that the cuckold’s minuscule penis could no longer even touch the walls.  These cuckolds obviously never fucked a woman after she had a kid or two, so they do not realize that the vagina is able to accommodate large things and go back to normal.

At any rate, the question remains.  Do men with smaller cocks have more of a propensity to be turned on by sharing their wives with more endowed men?   Do gay men who get off on being cuckolded have a similar relationship in penis size?

I’m eager to read your comments and thoughts on this.  E-mail works.

Free Porn – The Butterfly Effect

I’m sure you’ve heard the ads for it if you listen to podcasts at all, The Butterfly Effect, a story about how the world changed when a guy came up with the idea to make porn available for free.  I’ve been listening to it over the last two days and am almost finished. 

I highly recommend it.  The commercials for it come across like it would be preachy in some way, but it isn’t.  Just good journalism and story telling.  And you learn new stuff everyday.  I had no idea of the back story behind PornHub, RedTubes, Ashley Madison and how the pay for porn industry changed into a more boutique industry.

As a cheapskate, I say, long live free porn!

Writing For Fun…

I’ve been having a conversation with a new reader recently who found me through Literotica.  He was one of the few people who found something positive in The Veronica Story.  As a side note, can I just say that in spite of the fact that so many people on the Internet are jerks, there is something so positive about connecting with people who seem to “get” you.

Anyway, this gentleman was kind enough to enjoy Veronica, so I sent him some of the older stuff that I had posted and long ago removed.  Reading back over The Cashier I recalled just how much enjoyment I got out of writing fictional accounts of real people.

This takes me back to years ago in my youth.  I was horrible in English class in high school, and only a B student in my first two English courses in college. I attribute my shittiness not from an inability to read and write or use reasonable grammar, but being more interested in writing fun things and less interested in diagramming sentences.

I wish now that I had saved the many stories I wrote as a kid.  This is before computers and thumb drives and the ability to email a copy of your story to yourself or post it on a blog.  I was sort of like that kid in Stand by Me, writing goofy stories and sharing them with my friends.

I don’t want to get specific, but I did create a series of characters that lived really weird lives that, if I had saved the paper these stories were typed on, I could have perhaps recreated into more polished works.  No, not my own Harry Potter series or the next Game of Thrones, but just goofy folks that popped into my mind and flowed on paper.

It took years and a lot of actual sex before my writing would shift to an adult nature.  I feel less like a writer and more like a reporter when it comes to sex.  I’ve always avoided the use of the standard verbiage you see in a lot of smut. 

For cuckold’s stories, you always see the reference to “the marital bed.”  Uh, sure.  Okay.  Yes, when the husband and wife go to bed, it is the marital bed.  What if they are at a hotel?

I will use the terms cock and dick interchangeably, but I shy away from “turgid member.” I’d say with good reason.

Of course, I’m not opposed to good, descriptive writing.  By all means, I love it.  In fact, Aunt Clara has referred me to several descriptive works.  Since my wife and I enjoy, The Outlander, I’ve started reading the book(s).  That Diane Gabaldon can write some descriptive sex!

But when you read my blog, I am posting things that were written in pretty much ten to fifteen minutes and done.  Just the facts, Ma’am.  Anyway, I do think if I had more time to spend on such things, I would enjoy writing some fictional stuff.  Granted, posting on Literotica is not going to happen again, but perhaps just here.  We’ll see.